During the preschool years, children are aware of their own bodies and also become curious about other people’s bodies. They are keenly aware of physical differences between themselves and the people around them. By now, we expect that children can label body parts, including sexual organs, by their appropriate names. They may also start to use other terms based on peer interactions.

Body Awareness and Exploration

Preschoolers are aware of their physical bodies and their sex organs. They may engage in many typical behaviors, such looking at their naked bodies or touching their genitals. Sexual behavior in this stage of development is sensory and based on curiosity. Preschoolers do not have a concept of erotic pleasure, but they do understand that certain parts of the body produce pleasurable sensations when touched. Some children will touch themselves to self-soothe.

Preschool children may explore their bodies in private, but some will touch themselves in public places. If a caregiver notices this behavior, they can gently educate the child about appropriate and inappropriate body exploration.

The American Academy of Pediatrics lists several common sexual behaviors for preschoolers (AAP, 2023). These include:

• touching/rubbing genitals in public or private
• looking at or touching a peer’s or sibling’s genitals
• showing genitals to peers
• standing or sitting too close to someone
• trying to see peers or adults naked

Body Safety and Consent

As mentioned in Chapter 5, infants and toddlers should learn about basic body safety and be encouraged to express consent about their bodies being touched. This education should continue in the preschool years and can include more explicit information about personal safety, such as discussions about sexual abuse and inappropriate touch. Children can be taught about privacy and learn that their body is private and that no one has the right to touch them. They can also be taught about the social boundaries involving their bodies, such as not allowing other children to touch them in their private areas.

It is important to teach children about consent and encourage them to exercise their voice when someone violates their personal boundaries and body. They should not be forced to hug, kiss, or touch anyone that they do not want to. Similarly, preschool children should be allowed to have privacy when changing their clothes or bathing (if developmentally appropriate). Children should be taught to report situations that feel uncomfortable or when someone violates their body space.

Figure 7.10 shows the American Academy of Pediatrics guidelines for common and uncommon sexual behavior for 2- to 6-year-olds.

Licenses and Attributions for Sexual Development

“Sexual Development” by Christina Belli is licensed under CC BY 4.0.

Figure 7.10. American Academy of Pediatrics, 2023.